It seems I might have opened a can of worms James, I hope your memories aren't too painful.
Here are a couple that come to mind. On guard one night. CSM O' Dowd was on duty He was particually agitated and white as a sheet. He us told to stand to and surround and subdue a Scottish Joker who was out after Last Post if he decided to cut up rough.
Ginger Kelly was a legend. Huge and powerfully built, His size made Peter Deakin a PTI who held the current Mr South of Britain title look like a Charles Atlas before advert. He was around six, six, easily the largest in the Barracks, a re enlistment and, it seemed, well known to Paddy. The word was passed in from outside that Ginger was coming up the road, he was only around fifteen minutes late.
Paddy was fair sh*tt*ng himself. Into the Guard House staggered Ginger, We all lamely said 'Sorry Ginge' as we surrounded him. God knows what we could have done if he decided to cut up rough. I think we were all as scared of him as Paddy was. "That's all right lads" he said. Walked straight into the cell, lay down and slept it off.
Paddy was out of that bloody Guard Room like a shot. He didn't show face in the morning either.
Another time we were in the hut laying on our beds after lunch. the beds looked a bit ruffled. Well more like Sh*t heaps actually. The new C O. accompanied by the hut nco's and O'dowd called us 'too' after parade.
He was a fair joker and said it wasn't good enough. He personally gave us a demonstration of how he wanted the beds to look in the future. Oh and by the way, he had progressed up from the coal face, none of your hoity toity, Public School "Educated Idiot" type about him.
We had to box the blankets, wrap the green mattress cover with the red centre line around the outside, Remove the pallyass (mattress) cover and fold it on top off the mattress which was folded in three and placed at the back of the bed. The boxed blankets sat on top. He gave us half an hour to complete the task. O Dowd told our Corporal to check the room before final inspection.
The Officer wasn't very thrilled with what he saw until he singled out my bed as being the only one that hit the mark required. Then he bollocked me naked for not helping the others and told me we work as a team in the army. A point well taken and, I might add, digested.
O' dowd was in his element. Seizing the opportunity to look good in front of the CO he ripped into the Corporal. The CO didn't seem impressed and turned away as O'Dowd carried on asking if he had heard what the officer required. The poor bloke muttered he had carried out an inspection. "Well report sick with your eyes and ears" ordered O' Dowd trailing the Officer out of the room. Next morning, the Corporal was outside the medical room reporting for sick parade. I felt sorry for the Corporal until a few days later the ratbag had to go home and the bastard hit on me for a loan of my best beret. We were posted on to St.Omer before he returned and I lost one best beret. What a pisser!
The dormitory bedding was perfected with string lining up everything end to end and crosswise, blankets were boxed to satisfaction. Oh the joys of being a sprog.